Hi fellow Doggers,
You may remember that I gave my Mom a scare a few days ago, with my Hystiocytoma thingy.
Well, here’s the update!
The vet STABBED me with a needle to take a sample to make sure that it was a benign thingy!
Actually, I didn’t even know I had it until he STABBED me with that needle.
Now, I know it’s there and I just can’t keep my tongue off of it.
Mama has tried wrapping it up – FAIL!
The bandage slipped down instantly and I had total access to my hystio thingy.
She’s tried spraying my fur with some No LICK stuff — GINORMOUS FAIL!
That stuff actually tasted pretty good. I’m going to ask her to spray it on my kibble!
But Horror of Horrors!
Just because I couldn’t exercise a little will power regarding licking my Hystio thingy, now I am trapped in the collar of shame.
I’m so depressed!
Mama says it could be worse. I could have the CONE OF SHAME!
She actually bought two things from the pet store — This inflatable collar thing and the cone. She likes this on me better. She says it’s less intrusive. She says it will keep me from licking my elbow with the least restrictive movement. She says the Cone is even more restrictive and it’s hard and uncomfortable. She says a lot!
BUT SHE’S NOT THE ONE WEARING THIS DEMONIC CONTRAPTION! I AM!
I will admit that I seem to have lost interest in licking my hystio thingy. Maybe if I forget about the hystio thingy long enough, Mama will take this COLLAR FROM THE “H” “E” DOUBLE TOOTH PICKS OFF! MAMA ARE YOU LISTENING!
One good thing — Mama seems to feel guilty about this and I seem to be getting more treats than usual. I got an entire duck stick right after she put it on.
Guilt could work to my advantage.
I’ll keep you posted, fellow Doggers!
Lick you later!