Boys in the Doghouse

Mama says it’s Murphy’s Law that anything that can go wrong will. Regarding us kids (fur and human), she says there is a corollary that says that if there is a big holiday coming up where good behavior is necessary and a good parental mood is a boon, the kids will misbehave in some way.

Yes, Fellow Doggers, that’s what, happened to me and my hu-brothers.

Here we are the day before Fathers Day. Mama has planned to make Daddy’s favorite breakfast, and we’re already gearing up for some really great Alpha dog favorite activities that everyone is going to love and well… we all messed up. … The good thing is that we did it before noon. This means we have the a good portion of the day left to make it up to Mama and Daddy (if I ever get out of this crate.)

What did we do?

It was all the same kind of thing really. We all got an “attitude”. I don’t really know what that means fellow doggers. Maybe your hu-moms and dads can explain it better than I can. I’ll just tell you what we did.

Let’s start with my big brother! Let me just say first that he’s a teenager.

What did he do? Well, he “sassed” Mama one too many times. How many is too many? Once is enough if Mama’s in a bad mood and she’s in one because of the “sass” the previous day. So, he got a big lecture about “attitude” and “long summer” and “lots to lose”… I didn’t’ pick up all of it. Mama was talking kind of fast.

Now my little brother — What did he do?

He was “provoking” – this is something that happens often. Usually, he provokes my big brother and there’s a little tussle. Then, Mama yells at both of them. This time it was me he provoked.

Now on to me – the prisoner.

I was sitting on the couch as usual keeping watch over my street. (It is mine; no one is allowed to walk on it and especially not on the family side of the street! By the way, when I mean no one, I mean no cats, dogs, humans, birds, squirrels, skunks, raccoons, or other vermin and especially no mail carriers!)

Somebody walked by and I was barking at them, issuing my usual threats. Michael decided that I shouldn’t do that, so he grabbed me. I wasn’t expecting him to grab me, so I growled and snapped at him. I didn’t get him. I just let him know I had teeth.

Mama heard me from the back bedroom and asked what happened. Michael told on me. (To be fair he left nothing out.) She called me “naughty dog.” She said that I am never to growl and snap at her puppies – ever. Then she told me to go to my crate for a time out. I’m not dummy. Mama was really mad ( Still in a bad mood from my older brother!) so I went into the crate with my tail tucked beneath my legs. Mama called me a good boy for doing that but said I needed some quiet time to myself. Then she closed the crate up.

At least Michael got a talking to about grabbing me when I’m in my territorial mode. She told him that I’m not supposed to growl and snap at him, but he’s not supposed to do things to make me growl and snap.

Provoking doesn’t get anyone off the hook with Mama. The provoker gets in the trouble and the sucker victim poor innocent provokee gets in trouble for succumbing to the provocation. Everybody loses. I suppose the lesson is that even if you’re provoked, that’s no excuse. I get it, but I’m not happy about it.

Michael and I are both pouting a little.

I can already see that Mama’s “mad face” going away. My older brother apologized and kissed her on the cheek. My younger brother said he was sorry immediately. He’s already quietly enjoying a movie on Netflix while I’m still in the “dog house.”

Hopefully, I’ll be out of this crate in time for all the cool Fathers Day stuff we do tomorrow.

Wish me luck fellow doggers!

Your Pal

Opie, inmate 23157