Secret Dog Park Revealed – Dogs of the World Protest for Access!

 

Hi all, Opie here!

 

Mama took me some place special the other day! We had to sneak in.

It was the best dog park ever!

I think we should all have parks this big!

What do you think?

Let’s start a petition!

The Story of Opie and the Four Humans

Once upon a time,

There was a little doggie named Opie. He moved into his forever home. He was trying to find his favorite place to sleep.

 

He tried his Mama’s slipper,

 

But it smelled too much like Mama’s foot. PHOOEY!

 

He tried Mama’s tummy, but it was too soft and squishy. Sorry, Mom you really need to say no to the French fries, or at least share more of them with ME!!

 

He tried sleeping on Daddy, but he was too fidgety.  Dude, I’m trying to sleep here, why do you keep reaching for stuff… you don’t need reading glasses, or to blow your nose, or… Dude… you put the alarm on COME BACK TO BED!!!

 

He tried sleeping with Michael, but …..

 

It was too crowded. Geez Michael, I think there’s stuff UNDER this pillow. Why is there a comic book in the bed?

 

Okay Spiderman … you’ve gotta go. Yes, I am biting your special web shooting hand. Get out of this bed before I give you the Mr. Weenie treatment!

 

Opie asked to sleep in Gregory’s bed in the top bunk, but Gregory exercised his prerogative as oldest male child ( Age 12) and said

 

“Seriously? I mean .… Seriously?”

 

Opie went back to Mama and Daddy’s room jumped in the bed, turned around and around and found a spot that was

 

Just right.

 

 

 

The End

 

 

 

Happy Birthday to my Hu –Brother Michael!

A Birthday Poem in honor of my Hu-brother’s 9^th Birthday!

 

 

If I had a birthday wish for you,

It’d be you were a puppy too!

I’d sniff your butt and lick your nose

And you’d have claws instead of toes.

We’d chew up Mama’s favorite shoes,

And piddle on Dad’s important News.

But you’re not a puppy. That is clear,

But you have the heart or pretty near

Of one who loves to jump and play.

So that is why I have to say,

You are my funny human brother

Who lets me share his dearest mother

And snuggle in the bed sometimes

And helps me make up silly rhymes.

You let me chew up all your laces

And you scratch me in all the places

That I love and need a rub!

Yes, you are the king of belly rub!

Sometimes I chew a little off your toe

But you never tell me Whoa!

You play full out and fast and hard

And that is why I call you “pard”.

You put beef broth into my food

For that you are the coolest dude!

I hope you get all your treats,

And we’ll play more as weather heats!

Happy Birthday Dearest Mike

I hope you get all the stuff you like!

 

 
Licks and Tummy Rubs

and

Lots of Love,

 

Your puppy brother

Opie

 

 

 

 

 

 

Opie Puts his Paw Down Over Doggy Couture and makes a Deal

Hi there Opie here,

I am a long haired Snorkie. I have fine white, wispy and beautiful white and grey hair that covers my entire body. I’ll admit I don’t’ have an undercoat, but this winter my hair came in pretty thick. Mama says it’s my winter coat. Okay, so Mama explain to me why you’ve bought me a Christmas sweater and blue and green sweater and a rain coat and a parka? I’m not a short haired almost hairless doggy, and there is NO snow on the ground where we live. Why do you insist on buying me these things?

Mama: Well, Opie you look so cute in them.

Opie: Cute…that’s why you put me in those sweaters and things because I look CUTE!

Mama: Now Opie, be reasonable. You know it’s mostly for a photo opportunity. I’m not keen on you rolling in the mud in that new green and purple sweater and I tossed the parka. It was too small.

Opie: Mama will you admit that our weather does not really support these….doggy clothes.

Mama: Now listen when I send you out in the AM it is about 40 degrees outside, and a few weeks ago it was colder than that and rainy. I’m not going to apologize for putting you in a rain coat. You have another think coming Mr. Furry Pants.

Opie: Now calm down. I’ll admit that on raining cold mornings a rain coat or a sweater might not be out of line, but will you admit that right now with a high today of 72 a sweater is unnecessary.

Mama: Did I put you in a sweater today?

Opie: No, but…

Mama: Have I put you in a sweater or coat any day that the weather did not call for it. Do you remember this deluge? Do you remember be wet on every part of your little furry body except where the raincoat covered you?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mama: Do you remember this deluge? The water came up past the sidewalk that day.
You dog paddled during the walk!

       

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Do you remember finding the only dry spot on our lawn – in the overgrown ground cover!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You know why the squirrels weren’t out Opie? Because they DIDN’T HAVE RAIN GEAR!!!!
Opie: Uh…
Mama: And the sweaters — How long do have on these sweaters usually?
Opie: Uh…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mama: About 4 minutes tops… just enough time to snap several photos using the continuous shooting mode. After that time you start biting it and pulling it off. Are you really busting my chops over these little doggy sweaters – each of which you’ve only worn once?
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Opie: Uh…Er…Uh….

Mama: Now what brought this on… it was NOT that silly WSJ article on Yahoo. Opie: Well, no…
Mama: Come on out with it…

Opie: Well, it was Charlie.

Mama: Charlie! Who the devil is Charlie?

Opie: Here Mama! This is Charlie and Mavis too.

Mama: Oh I see.

Opie: Mama they had on coats and sweaters at the day care the whole time we were there, and we were indoors. And you can see they have lots of hair. Both of them are Pomeranians.

Mama: Opie I don’t know why their owners sent them to an indoor daycare in coats and sweaters. Maybe they have health issues or maybe … well I did see a lot of dominating going on when I checked in on you. Maybe their owners think that’s some sort of protection? I don’t know what the situation is so I’m not going to say. The back end of that place is open to the outdoors.

Opie: Mama, that is so lame. I just want to be sure that you don’t send me to the daycare place in my sweater or raincoat. Mavis and Charlie stayed on their cots the whole time and never played. I think they were too hot to play. I wanted to play with them!

Mama: Opie I’ll make a deal with you. How about I only put you in those doggy clothes when the weather requires it and maybe for a quick 3-4 minute photo opportunity tops. That includes antler ears and elf hats and that cool little t-shirt I saw on the internet the other day.

Opie: Can’t you Photoshop in the antlers and the elf hat next year?

Mama: Maybe … do we have a deal?

Opie: Okay…Hey Mama maybe I should help Charlie take off his coat next time I go to day care. It does look nice and chewy.

Mama: Opie….!

Wordless Wednesday – A Series of Unfortunate Events

 

I present before you a photographic Tale

 

A Series of Unfortunate Events

– An ill fated Christmas doggy toy.

 

 

Mr. Weenie is presented for play.

 

 

And the ravaging begins.

 

Oucheee!

 

 

Oh no, Mr. Weenie!

 

Ahhhhhh!

Eeeeeee!

 

 

Mama, Mr. Weenie is all bended up!

I think he’s dead.

Oops!

 

 

Meat and Cheese – a Snorkie’s dream come true?

Hi All,

Opie here!

My Mama and Daddy have been obsessed with the magic screen lately. They’ve been watching these guys in motorcycle helmets run around on a green yard chasing a brown chew toy for hours today. I’ve spent most of the time in Daddy’s lap, but he’s been rather uncomfortable to sit with. He keeps yelling and hopping up and down. On the upside, I managed a few stolen Doritos. Daddy is really happy with this Green packing team that just won. He jumped up and the Doritos hit the floor. Call me Opie the Opportunistic!

I asked Mama what these Green Packers pack. Mama says they pack the football across the field and make touch downs. Mama also says that the name comes from the meat packing company that sponsored their uniforms when they first began. MEAT PACKING! Well these are my kind of people! I’m kind of excited that the Meat packers are going to a Super Bowl. This sounds exciting! I wish I could go. I’d like to get some of that cheese that I see people wearing at the game. Meat and Cheese! A dog’s dream! (See my friend getting a taste of the hat! I wish I could get me some of that!) However, I’m generally not too happy with this obsession with the magic box. They should focus on me, not those silly humans.

To be fair, I can see the fascination with the big cheese hats. That usually catches my attention, but the guys running round and landing on each other. Well, it looks like a dog pile to me. You be the judge. Here’s a puppy pile I found on the internet.

The second picture is a Green Bay Packers pile. Which one do you think is cuter?

It’s obvious to me. Now if the Green Bay Packers brought some of their meat to the pile and maybe some cheese too, I think they would definitely be the more attractive pile. I’ve decided that the brown chew toy they play with is a meat ball. Now I would chase that. I probably wouldn’t share it though. I’m just being honest. I’d be at the bottom of the pile with my teeth firmly in it.

Anyhow, we’ll see how this Super Bowl thing goes in a few days. I have some thoughts on that too. I hope the Green guys bring a lot of meat and cheese. Mama says that it will wall to wall people. Well, with all that cheese and meat, it could be wall to wall doggies too!

Truly the only saving grace to my parents’ football obsession is the snacks. I’ve stolen a lot of Doritos today!

Come to think of it… maybe it’s not such a bad obsession after all.

Related Articles

• Packers defeat Bears to reach the Super Bowl (reuters.com)

Opie Hears a Who! What?

Or The Village of Opie

Hi all,

Opie here!

In the past I’ve had a bad habit of rolling in cat poo in our backyard. This has earned me several impromptu baths. I am happy to say that I’ve fallen out of love with that particular habit. I’ve learned my lesson. Look at my photo. Do I look happy? If there is any doubt let me just say this. NOT HAPPY!

Unfortunately, I have to suffer a new indignity. Rigorous Brushing after every backyard trip.

Let me explain. It all began when Gregory spotted this beetle crawling out of my hair and in between my eyes. There was some screaming and the next thing I knew someone was jamming a doggy wipe into my face and the grooming brush was coming toward my head. Then there was the time this huge spider decided to debark from me inside the house over the top of somebody’s foot. There was much screaming, again. Then of course there is the occasional ant that decides to peer out from between my beautiful white locks and say, “How, ya doin’?”

Look, when I go into the backyard I have to do a full sweep of the area for obnoxious trespassing rodents. Squirrels do occasionally come down out of their trees. I am a natural tracker. Sometimes my investigation takes me into the fern bed, the trumpet vines, the ivy, and the Nandina bushes. Sometimes the small inhabitants of this foliage decide to take a ride with me.

My mom is a pro animal kind of gal, but she draws the line at insects.

“Opie, as long as the bugs stay outside they are fine with me. Inside, it’s a different story entirely!”

She says this as she reigns death from above with her grooming brush and dry shampoo spray. Poor little ants, and beetles and baby spiders!

“Mama, I’m a village of small little six legged creatures. You should be more tolerant. They just hitched a ride. They’re like those little Whos in that story you read at Christmas.”

She, of course, ignores me and continues brushing and wiping. I already have to have drops on my back once a month for fleas. (I don’t mind that at all. I hate fleas) but ants…. Well they don’t bother me too much. They’re kind of cute. (Don’t tell anyone, but if you can get three in a row, they don’t taste too bad either. Shhh.)

Then Mama plays her trump card.

“Opie, you are the only one non- human creature allowed in our bed. If you want to sleep with us, the Whos gotta go.”

 

 

 

 

Michael chimes in, “Maybe we should rename him Horton.” Boy, did Michael get a look!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So I am getting brushed EVERYWHERE until Mama is satisfied that I’m clean.

 

 To be fair, the most extensive brushing occurs after my last pee run. Also, to be fair, I like it when she does the area near my tail. It feels kind of soothing. Also, to be fair I have been known to drop off to sleep when she alternates the brushing with tummy rubbing.

I love sleeping with Mama and Daddy.

 

 

 

So long all you little 6 legged Whos!

 

 

 

 

Wordless Wednesday – New Meaning to Cave Canum

We’ve been considering signs to put on our back yard gate.

What do you think?

 

I think Mama likes this one. She’d take all that yellow writing off.

 

I actually like this one. My mama is pretty scary sometimes and my hu-brothers are quite big for their ages.

Or we could go back to the drawing board.

I want mama to Photoshop a squirrel in my mouth.

 

Mango Minster – I don’t know why I’ve been entered in contest.

 

Okay, this is my entry into the Mango Minster Contest. I don’t’ know why Mom has entered me in Bad Sport Category.

I am
NOT
a bad sport.

Here are the criteria – evidently. I am going to answer them point by point.

1. Is every toy, bone, or bed on your estate YOURS whether you are using it or not?
   
2. Do you bully the other fur kids in your pack?
   
3. Do you hide foodables in your mouth even if you don’t like them just so nobody else can have them?
   
4. Are all your stuffies beheaded or disemboweled?
   
5. Do you already have a plan in place to bribe the bad sport judge or to stuff the reader’s choice ballet box?
   
6. In the absence of medical issues, are your potty habits still, ahem, relaxed?
   
7. When your humans say, “come” do you just stare at them waiting for them to prove they have noms?
   

 

1. Every toy and bone IS
   mine. I am the only dog in this house. (And I plan on keeping it that way!!!) Just because I like to lay claim to all my human brothers’ socks, chew the occasional expensive basket ball shoe does not mean that I am a bad sport. In fact, I’d like to think that I am very good for the house. My human brothers have to learn how to put stuff away. Because if I can get to it — It IS mine! This works well for me since I can jump ANYWHERE accept the top bunk of my older human brother’s bed. I am working on it. I ‘m in training right now. The incident with the pumpkin pie on the kitchen counter — that was a mere training exercise. Oh have you seen my new townhome crate? I have an upstairs now. Perfect spot for harassing the mail carrier! Yes, I also have a perch on the sofa, and the spot between Daddy and mama in the bed is MINE, not my human brothers! NO kisses until I get my belly rub! I am the cute one.
   

    

2. I don’t bother the other “fur kids in my pack” There are no other fur kids. What about Michael? He’s not a fur kid. He’s human and we’re about the same age in dog years. So I like to chew on him a little. He likes it! Really, he does. Admittedly, while he’s trying to get his socks and shoes on for school, may not be the best time, but we’re great buddies. He loves to play with me. I do tolerate him picking me up and holding me like a baby. If I allow that, then shouldn’t I get some sock chewing time. Come on… throw me a sock!
   

    

3. Stuffing food in my mouth – that’s disgusting. I don’t’ do that. Why should I? I just eat it. I do like to hide bully sticks, but what self respecting Snorkie doesn’t? That’s not disgusting. What’s disgusting is that I keep losing them! Help me! I can’t find my bully stick! AHHHHHHHH! (Whine!)
   

    

4. Mama seems to think that just because she’s had to sew up my toys a couple of times that that’s my fault. What about the Toy manufacturers – don’t they know that we dawgins have teeth? I like to use mine on Mr. Weenie, Mr. Greenie, Hedge and my new sleepy puppy. I can’t help it if their guts just sort of fall out of their fabric covered bodies. How is that my fault? Clearly not!
   

    

5. I don’t’ really need to stuff the readers ballot box. I don’t’ want to win the bad sport award. I’d rather win the “cracker dog award” Which should be renamed jerky or treat dog award by the way. I like meat. My guess is that my fellow blog buddies do to. Wouldn’t you like some nice delicious jerky. I can imagine some nice doggies and kitties who vote for me getting some jerky in the mail some day.. delicious tasty jerky…hmmm.
   

    

6. Okay now the potty thing – now I’ve had 2 accidents in the whole time I’ve lived with my Mama and Daddy. Both times were their fault. They’ll admit that. ‘Nuf said!
   

    

7. Okay on the other issue – coming when called. I’ll admit that I may have a certain ‘deafness when I ‘m involved in sniffing out a rodent in the backyard or harassing the squirrels are barking at our human neighbor next door. Why do they call me when I’m busy? Can anyone answer me that?
   

    

Mama you and I need to have a serious talk. I am NOT a bad sport. However, I do like winning stuff so… I suppose, just this once…

Update Part II — Just A few More Crate Training Tips

The Rest of the Crate Training Blog — Part II

For those that are seriously contemplating crate training. Part II of my crate training update might be useful. So this is just a quick little post with a few crating tips.

Just a few Crating Tips — Things we’ve discovered and would like to share

• Do NOT use the Crate as a punishment. If Opie’s misbehaved, and we ALL need a time out, we ask him to sit. (He’s pretty much on the Dean’s list with the Sit command!) We praise him for sitting on command and THEN we ask him to go to crate. Then we praise and maybe treat for that. We use sit to distract him from his naughtiness. Once distracted then he can go to his little house.
  

  
  

• Be regular with praise even if you aren’t regular about treating when rewarding for following any command. Opie does a lot for love and baby talk (and the occasional nose kiss.)
  

   

• We try not to make a huge deal out of letting Opie out of the crate. (Remember it’s not jail. It’s his special sanctuary.) So leave the door open all the time. (The only exception is when I need to brush him. He tries to escape me in there so I close the door so I can be sure and finish getting the snarls out of his very silky and “mattable” hair.
  

   

• We still occasionally treat him in the crate. (Need a supply of healthy treats for your pooch. We like chicken jerky and our friend Gus from According to Gus loves liver.) The treats should be his/her absolute favorite and not given that often. People call them “high value” treats.
  

   

• We leave him alone in his crate. (No belly rubs through the bars or nose tickles.) He’s on his own in there. He can chew his antler or sleep. It’s his pad!
  

   

  • He retreated to his crate after the pumpkin pie incident. He was hiding from us in the crate since he knew he done a naughty thing. Crating himself was a good thing. So no scolding while in the crate — It’s his sanctuary. (Not sure scolding works at all really)
    

   

• Opie never whined in his crate, but if he had our plan was to ignore it until he stopped and THEN let him out. We didn’t want him to get the idea that whining worked. I think we missed the whining issue because 1) He likes his crate, and 2) We put him in for short periods of time only, for a long time.
  

  
  

• Opie likes to keep a few toys in the crate, but we don’t let him keep more than two in there at a time. Toys are good in there, but not too many.
  

   

• We just discovered that Opie goes to create well for ME only. So here’s the tip. Anyone in the family who needs to be able to make him Go to Crate needs to work on it with him. So the boys will be working with Opie for a few minutes after school EVERY DAY until Opie goes to crate for them as well as he goes for me and his Dad.
  

   

• Where to put the crate in the first place? The internet if full of great advice about crate training, but the best advice I got was from the pamphlet that came with our crate. It contains pretty much everything you need. Some people place their crates away from everyone so that the dog can have a truly private place. This is the opposite of the advice we got from our crate pamphlet. The pamphlet suggested that the crate be placed near the family, but still in semi private place, like a corner of the family room. I can’t help but think that Opie’s crate contentment stems from the fact that he’s not in the laundry room, or near the garage door. His crate is in a heretofore unused dusty corner of our family area. He’s got some privacy, but he’s also still with us 99.9 percent of the time. Consider carefully where you place your crate.
  

 

Well, that’s all I can think of for now. People will probably have their own tips and suggestions and I am by no means any sort of dog training expert. There are great training videos on the internet and I know for a fact that some of my blogger buddies are pros at all sorts of dog training stuff. The purpose of this series was to show people what a non dog trainer can do. My personal belief is that if you give good love and boundaries to your “furrever” friend, the relationship will be easier and more satisfying for everyone concerned.

Have a great day!

Opie’s mom